Closure and Purpose
Posted on Tue Sep 11th, 2018 @ 6:22pm by Sotah & Rusasha Djehuti-Lahan
3,816 words; about a 19 minute read
Chapter:
Chapter V: Unbound
Location: Reborn Jedi Temple, Coruscant
Timeline: A day after "The Lion, the Shadow, and the War Room"
OLD
Ryn turned to Ru who gazed back at him with a hopeful look in her bright green eyes. Ryn could see every bit of Ru's mother in those blazing emerald orbs; all the beauty, all the bravery, and all the joy and love of life. He sighed and relented with a nod. "Very well. We will seek our wayward souls...together."
NEW
When Rynseh said "together", he meant only Zenarrah and himself. He had no intention of bowing to his daughter's desire to travel with him. Even after her father hid from her for three years, and promised to be closer to her, Rusasha was left standing at the spaceport to watch Ryn's ship, the Descent, leave Coruscant behind without her. Zen had said nothing offering only a sullen glance as compensation despite the brief Force bond they formed and their shared dream of an independent Jedi sisterhood. It was heartbreaking, their rejection of Ru having teased a few tears from her eyes, but it wasn't entirely unexpected. She knew that while her father loved her deeply, it was clear through the Force that he harbored an even deeper shame of her very existence. She was a constant reminder of his failure of upholding the Jedi Code by giving in to a night of true love. Ru's birth also caused the death of her mother, and that only added to Ryn's regrets.
She looked away from the evening sky and willed her sorrow away. She was no longer a girl enslaved to her feelings and had to step up and prove herself as a lightsaber-carrying adult. She was, after all, a Jedi Knight with a lot of new expectations hanging over her. Her promotion to Knighthood was very recent, and she didn't quite know the extent of her responsibilities to the Order just yet. She did, however, know that soon she may be prompted to choose an apprentice, but she had no desire to teach anytime soon, especially when she was a struggling padawan who barely passed her trials less than a few months earlier. For the moment, she needed answers regarding the fate of her own master, Loren, and Rynseh had told her before leaving that it came to his attention that Master Sotah was the one who held the answers to that mystery.
The Selkath man known as Sotah was a sage among sages meditating quietly by himself under the moonlight. An incorruptible paragon of the Light whose luminous radiance in the Force was such that even the Grand Master of the Order himself couldn't quite match. Rusasha had taken Force-training and Form-I lightsaber lessons under Sotah's grandfatherly tutelage when she was only a youngling. During that time, she was inspired by his gentle wit and compassion such that she felt a great desire to be more like him, and wanted to serve the Light with the same brand of kindness and wisdom as he did.
It was strange to think she held such secret admiration for him, especially when a species like the Selkath would have been a favorite dinnertime dish for some Cathar in earlier, more primitive times. Personally, she harbored no such carnivorous taste, especially when natural protein substitutes from plants and non-sentient fish were the only "meat" she required to satisfy her feline hunger.
Her only regret was that more of her training didn't come directly from Sotah, but Loren was one of his star pupils, and thus his positive influence continued through the human woman's guiding hand. Yet it puzzled Ru why Sotah's other famous student, Thane of Caanus, had turned his back on Sotah and the Order. She knew so little of Temple politics, and gossip was often such a rarity that she almost never heard any of it until long after news had traveled.
Ru stared for a moment at Sotah's serene presence, the master's back to her, and debated in her mind if disturbing him was the right thing to do at such a late hour. She smiled at him, and quietly turned away to her quarters and thought it best to seek him out in the morning.
"Young Rusasha." The gentle lisp-like gurgling of Master Sotah's interpretation of Galactic Basic halted the Cathar. The Jedi Master had not moved from his position, his taloned palms resting upon his robed knees, and his back rigidly straight, giving the otherwise-placid man a statuesque pose. "Please, join me. You are troubled."
This place, this humble garden was an oasis of beauty and serenity, a diminutive green dot in the midst of the all the heavy metals of the colossal city-planet. She saw Sotah was near the withering descendant of the tree that had an infamous story to it. It was said that long ago, the legendary Jedi-turned Dark Lord of the Sith, Anakin Skywalker, had a duel with a Dark Jedi named Barriss Offee, and that it ended when Anakin viciously threw Barriss with the Force into the tree near where Sotah was. In the years after the dark times when the Temple was reestablished, that tree had perished, but its seeds were replanted in the very same spot as a symbol of the Jedi Order's rebirth. Many Jedi were since known to choose the spot for meditation and reflection whenever they contemplated conflict within themselves, or to ponder the eternal struggle of the Light and Dark sides of the Force.
Upon hearing her name, Ru remembered when Loren used to call her "Ruhani" after learning about it being Ru's Djehuti tribal name on Cathar. It made her long for the human woman's company again, and it froze Ru's heart in dread and apprehension suspecting that Sotah may have known something bad had happened to her.
As she carefully knelt by Sotah's side, grateful for his warm presence, she took a deep breath as she recalled that Sotah was also one of the few, including Master Thurius, that knew the truth about her being the blood daughter of Rynseh Lahan. Still, this was about Loren, and she focused her thoughts in that direction.
"Yes, master," she affirmed Sotah's perception of her mental state. "It is so. I...I am deeply concerned about Master Loren. I wanted to try and find her myself, but Master Lah--..." she shook her head, and dropped the unnecessary pretense, her voice cracking under the weight of her emotions, "...my father told me you already knew of her fate. I've lost so much rest worrying about her. Please tell me...is she still with us? Can we bring her home?"
Sotah's eyes remained closed, his aquatic features unchanging in the face of Ru's words and concern. The calming aura of the Selkath even seemed to be flowing forth from the core of his person, in perfect harmony with the still beauty of their surroundings.
"Silence is not a void that hides one from hearing the truth," he said softly, eyes closed, "but rather a seeing glass into the truth. It is the sleep from which wisdom is nourished, if one only listens. I do not believe your father, who so easily lays bare his truths in the spoken word, has yet come to learn this. To his credit, however, he is an honest man of fine moral character."
The Jedi Master finally opened his shining dark eyes, glistening in the pale light of the moon far above, its visage partly obscured by the light pollution of the bustling ecumenopolis stretching out in all directions. "I would never deceive nor patronise you, Little Ru," he said, his voice touched by a faint sadness she had not heard in his words before, "but I would ask you to tell me first: what does your heart tell you?"
Rusasha glanced up at him, then turned to the tree that tied the garden together with its immobile sentinel presence. She released a long, heavy sigh, closed her eyes and nodded her head in acceptance of the most likely outcome. It took all she had to keep herself from crying at what she knew what was true within her heart. "My heart knew before I did...she's one with the Force now, isn't she? I failed her. 'A padawan is the right hand of her master, an extension of her master's service to the Force, guided by wisdom, humility, and the Code'. I should have been there by her side."
"An ancient complaint, spoken by many far less wise than yourself," Sotah said, not unkindly, and he now made to rise from his kneeling position. Once he was up, he clasped his hands together within the sleeves of his robes, and looked with thought at the young Jedi. "As Jedi, we are not infallible omniscient seers, privy to all eventualities. Loren's passing can in no way be attributed to any failing on your part. More than most, she led her own path within this mortal realm, and undoubtedly lived her physical life to the fullest extremes she so clearly adored. Her life, even if cut short, has been full; we should rejoice in what she achieved, what she saw... and what she saw in us. We can all only hope for a measure of the spark that spurred your master onwards, and I am quite convinced she has passed that onto you."
Rusasha rose to her feet and bowed her head to Sotah in gratitude for his compliment. "Most kind," she said with a hint of a smile, clasping her hands together in much the same way he was.
Sotah took his hands from his sleeve, and placed a delicate palm on Rusasha's robed shoulder. "You are a testament to both Loren and even myself, and I know she felt a great swell of pride for you quite unlike that she had felt for many others in her quite chaotic life." Sotah squeezed the shoulder gently. "Be sad, but be not troubled. Her legacy endures, both in you and in the Force."
"I will endeavour to honour her memory, master," Ru said with the intent of making a solemn oath, both to him and to the Force itself. "That is also why I wanted to see you. I understand the importance of training and meditation, but I want to be of service again. I have helped the needy and dealt with criminals in the Undercity before, but I have trained for a long time to do more. I feel a deep calling to go out amongst the stars, to follow in Loren's footsteps and cast the Light on the shadows of this galaxy. Is there anything I can personally do on behalf of the Temple beyond Coruscant? I am ready to answer the call."
Her master’s master appeared to pause as he mulled the request. A flicker of his trademark renowned craftiness seemed to glint in his eyes, a warming thing to see for Ru, especially after his recent, but entirely forgivable, gloom. “And what call is that?”
"Sometimes it's a strange feeling in my heart when I open my eyes from meditation," she explained, "and other times it comes more clearly from a dream I have occasionally. It's always the same dream. It takes place on a night just like this, and I see a Cathar woman much older than me, dressed like a tribal priestess, leading me by the hand away from this Temple. She always points up to the stars above." Ru turned and looked up skyward. "She says to me, 'In the heavens, they are waiting for you. Only a messenger of hope can save them from despair.'" She turned back to Sotah with a sigh, "Her words are so vague, master, and I don't even know who she is. I cannot tell if I'm supposed to go somewhere specific, or just follow my instincts and let the Force push me in the right direction. What do you think it means? It is really a call to action, or am I losing sight of my place here at the Temple?"
"We should always heed the call of our hearts, of the Force," Sotah lisped softly, placing a hand on the Cathar's shoulder, squeezing gently. "It may seem a misty trail, pointing away from we believe we truly desire, but it so often leads us to what we truly need - and those who need us. I cannot pretend to know the truths or meaning behind what you are seeing or hearing, but I know that if you follow the voice, and temper that with the wisdom you already so clearly have, you will be closer to finding the answers and purpose you seek."
After his best imitation of a standard Humanoid smile, Sotah after a second squeeze of Ru's shoulder before withdrawing his hand back into his robe. "Those are lofty words, I admit, but it would be wrong of me to guide you towards anything but your own answers. Sadly, you will find too many of our order content to direct you towards the stars in search of warriors to counsel and dark magicians to conquer, with no thought of looking inwards, bar to wage the occasional internal inquisition."
The Selkath's eyes twitched ever-so-slightly at his final comment. Whilst he had not said it with any malice, he seemed as though he had caught himself uttering something he had not, as if thinking he had spoken out of turn to his young companion. "However," he continued, brushing past what he had said as he stepped away to look upwards at the some of the Coruscanti traffic zooming by, "I do have something of a task I would ask of you... something that would be specially suited to yourself, I believe, and something I imagine to be quite illuminating. It may even salve some of the dark fancies of your recent ruminations, although I can make no promises."
"Of course, master," Ru said with eager nods. "I am more than ready."
"Don't be so eager just yet, Little Ru!" Sotah cautioned pleasantly. "You do not know what it is I intend to ask of you - nor do you know that this isn't, strictly-speaking, a Council matter." He allowed that comment to sit there for a moment, and although his manner remained positive, it shifted slightly in tone. "So, tell me: what do you know of Thane?"
"Not much, I'm afraid," Rusasha replied with a shrug and a shake of her head. "Aside from having a way with words and being incredible with a lightsaber, that is. I met him only a few short times. Saw him spar with the other padawans. We never said much to each other. I don't even think he knows my name. Why do you ask?"
The Selkath nodded, almost slightly amused as he appeared to consider Ru's description and recollection of the Human. "As you know, he was my padawan learner after Loren, another supposed challenge for the 'great and wise Master Sotah'." He let out a sad gurgle of breath, but seemed to do his best to overcome the brief malaise. "He took to the saber with a glee not usually favoured within the Reborn Order and, yes, when he discovered his character in its entirety, the words seemed to come more robustly from his mouth. In the latter parts of his teenage years, he seemed to more readily accept his heritage, as that of a king's son."
Sotah began pacing away from the tree, back towards the main temple. As Rusasha followed, a smattering of other Jedi could be seen in the distance, talking quietly and offering both Jedi Consulars the occasional surreptitious glance. "He came to the Reborn a bit older than most, after a tragedy befell the ruling family of Caanus - his family. A Dark Jedi by the name of Axion assaulted his family's home, killed most of the household and took both his mother and younger brother with them afterwards, presumably killing or selling them into slavery afterwards. It was only the bravery of a Rift Jedi that saved him, although Thane saw his murder."
The pair continued to step slowly, Sotah's voice sombre as his companion listened politely and intently. "Such sights leave terrible scars on one so young, and it was made no better by the reaction of his noble father, the Archae of Caanus. He became a reclusive, and seemingly shipped Thane off to the Order to save him any further concern or heartache, or so it would seem. Despite all that happened to him, the young Thane always seemed to be a happy, polite, and even kind Jedi, if a bit forthright and quick with his temper at times. Whilst age has a way of changing us all, Thane seemed to grow more content with becoming withdrawn and calculating, than eager and pleasant. He was always good to me, and so I tried to accept it as the dawning of maturity upon his conflicted, oft-times hero's, soul."
Sotah paused in front of an ageing mural ensconced along the wall, one known to have been shaped in the latter years of the Galactic Dark Age, in the wartorn years prior to the advent of the Third Republic and the Grand Proclamation, carved out of a shiny-smooth grey stone. It was a starkly disturbing piece to behold, depicting warped surrealist figures garbed in Mandalorian armour, twisted and bent around tall, thin figures wielding angular blades with beams of light stretching out from them, as if heralding the warriors as divine beings.
Its story was well-known to the Jedi and the mural was a favourite of the Reborn Order's first Grand Master, Junuun Waay. It depicted one of the many battles during the New Mandalorian Crusade, where the scattered remnants of the Jedi at the time achieved a great victory over the supposed-marauders, cutting a bloody swathe through their ranks.
By the way Sotah was eyeing the mural, it was clear he did not have the same appreciation for the piece, and it certainly appeared out of place in the fine and peaceful garden.
"I fear whatever peace Thane had within himself may have been unbound during his final assignment as a Jedi Knight," the Master now continued. "On Nar Shaddaa, he and Bomoor Thort encountered the Dark Master Axion, and his cult, and did battle with him, only for him to escape with an ancient relic. Shortly thereafter, Thane resigned from the Jedi Order. Loren died, and Bomoor also resigned." Sotah's shoulders sagged slightly, but he turned away from the ghastly artwork to face the Cathar woman once again. "My position on the Council as such is now tenuous, and I am considered an untrustworthy Master who has lost two apprentices. Master Thurius, also. Please do not think this me seeking sympathy, however; I wish only for you to be fully aware of the situation, and what you may be committing yourself to. I am not in favour with Master Quellus as your father is, and you risk earning that disfavour yourself by associating with me."
Ru nodded solemnly in understanding, Thane's history clearly an incalculable burden on the Selkath's weary shoulders. "I seem to recall a little girl from many moons ago, about ye high," Ru pondered nostalgically as she took a few paces away from Sotah's side, and lowering her palm to indicate the diminutive height. "She was an impressionable, wide-eyed little cub attending her first class on Force meditation. She was very nervous, filled with anxiety. And then there appeared this luminous man from Manaan, and he approached, knelt down, placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, and asked her, 'Why are you smiling, little one?' And she replied, 'I am not smiling, master.' And the sage corrected her with jovial laugh, 'I see you smiling in your heart. I see your soul, bright and cheerful as the sun. When we smile, does the Force not smile with us?'"
She turned and showed her warmest smile for Sotah, the same expression of joy she showed him as a youngling so long ago. "Rynseh Lahan is indeed my father by blood, this we know. It was a troubling time for you and the other masters and knights when the truth about me came out. I can never change that. But Sotah of Manaan, however, gave me something more important than family when I was sad, confused, and afraid of what everyone in the Temple was going to think of me in class. You taught me the meaning of compassion that day. Your words opened the Force to me, and I have embraced it ever since. I will never forget how such a modest act of kindness transformed my spirit and allowed it to blossom under the sun. Master..." she moved slowly to him again, "...with all due reverence to the Council, while their favour is valued, it's only temporal. But the Force is forever. It means more to me than anything to walk with those who set the examples of service that we are guided to live by. I wish to walk with you, master, as your apprentice. I don't fear the risk. There is only the Force."
"At times," Sotah said warmly, unable to repress that distinctly Selkath toothy smile once again, "I wonder that you might be wiser than the entirety of the Council put together. Loren often wondered from where your wisdom came, doggedly determined that it was not from her. Of that, she was wrong."
Whilst there was a sad tinge to his voice, Sotah's words were otherwise filled with an obvious pride, but he spoke again before the reverie became too pronounced. "I wish for you to go to Caanus, to the birthplace and home of Thane. Under the guise of a Jedi diplomat or watchman, I would ask that you find your way into the holdings of his family, circulate with the locals and speak with the household. Learn what you can about what has befallen that faraway world. Perhaps then, you might gain greater insight into the mind of young Thane. But most importantly, and I cannot stress this enough," Sotah explained, his voice shifting in pitch, becoming slower and kinder, "help them."
"I will prepare to depart first thing in the morning," she said without skipping a beat. "But master, were I to take one of our ships, surely the Council would notice? They will ask questions, perhaps even try to stop me from leaving."
"Oh, I am still officially a ranking member of the Jedi High Council," Sotah said with a chuckle and a warming hand on Ru's shoulder as he steered them both towards entering the Temple, "I'm sure they can forgive an old Selkath sending a prize pupil on a few... minor errands to the edge of the galaxy, wouldn't you say?"
TBC
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